This is a very special place — a page where the World's Only Wakeboarding Donkey answers the most Frequently Asked Questions that are frequently asked of him.
Q. Are you really a donkey?
A: What kind of question is that?! Don't be an ass. That's my job. Can we get some better questions in the house, please?
Q: What inspired you to learn how to wakeboard?
A: I've always been athletic, and I've always been around water. I've walked in it, carried it, peed in it... you get my drift. Well, as you know, most donkeys make a career out of being "beasts of burden," a term which means "carrying various heavy and sometimes dangerous objects". I needed a change. A new lifestyle. So I took up wakeboarding.
Q. Isn't it weird for a donkey to wakeboard?
A: It's even weirder to ask a donkey a question, and expect a reply. Although it's been known to happen. Just ask Balaam.
Q: What do you like to do in your free time, when you aren't wakeboarding?
A: Well, everyone needs a hobby or two. I happen to have four. I'm also a big fan of foreign cinema. Although, I do have a wild side, and have been know to get in trouble with the law. I also offer a valuable service, which I sell through eBay.
Q: Do ass jokes ever get old to you?
A: Quite the contrary — like a fine syrah, they age well over time.
OK, that's all for now. Time to hit the water.